Screenplay Beginning and Teacher Talk

 Hey! so I said in the last post that I'll introduce my screenplay and here I am! I started writing out the first page of the screenplay and I'm currently finished with it. Additionally, I had a talk with my Media Studies A Level professor, and she said I need to change some of the core of the story to lead up to the character's ultimate dismay. 

Here are some screenshots of the first page of my script. 

The chaotic opening I referenced in my other blogs is referred to here, I intend to execute it as written, but I do need to fix the formatting of the first monologue though. The second screenshot consists of the scene in which Thomas brings one of his gang members into his office and he explains to him the importance of shipping the delivery on time, this scene is going to show his first signs of distress and the mention of an opposing crime syndicate that's expecting much from this association. 

As for the teacher talk, she suggested including a fragment of my story to properly show my protagonist's "life-threatening" circumstance and how it ultimately leads to his suicide. She isn't the biggest fan of the suicide plotline, but she told me it'll be effective if I genuinely show one disastrous reason that the character would end his life over. Additionally, she said to keep the story simple and coherent with the 5-minute time span, she doesn't want to me to set it up as a full-length feature film. Therefore, I'm describing all the events that take place in the short film towards the main character, since he's the thematic symbol and main focus of the story. 

Soon, I should update this blog with the first completed script of my short film.